Bob had completely botched the Schilling presentation, and his boss had told him on the phone last night that he shouldn’t bother coming to work when he got back into town. Bob had considered himself pretty fortunate, with the economy in the shitter, to still be employed. Now, he wondered how he would make the payments on his house and car. His wife would leave him, for sure. And she’d take the kids with her.

At least he had secured a seat in the emergency exit row for the flight home. He slid into the window seat, fastened his seatbelt and closed his eyes.

He must have drifted to sleep, because when he opened his eyes again and looked out the window, they were flying high over endless stretches of farmland. His ears felt plugged up, so he yawned and popped them open.

“Anything interesting out there?”

The question had come from the seat next to his; a seat he hadn’t realized was occupied until he glanced in the direction of the deliciously sultry and distinctively female voice.

Sitting next to Bob was the most beautiful, perfect woman he had ever seen. It was as if someone had taken the best features of every woman he had ever found attractive, created a composite from them, and sat that woman next to him. She was wearing a dark skirt and jacket, with a ruffled blouse. An antique-looking broach hung from a gold chain around her neck. She wore nylons and black patent leather heels. Her chestnut hair was long, and she had flawless cream-colored skin and full lips. But it was her eyes that really got Bob’s attention. They were an incredible shade of dark blue he had never seen before. The more he looked into those eyes, the more he noticed about them. The flecks of gold in the irises. The thick lashes that framed them. He thought he could stare into those eyes for the rest of his life and be completely happy.

Bob suddenly realized that he had been staring.

“I’m so sorry,” he said. “It’s just that you’re…well, I’ve never…I mean…”

“I think I know exactly what you mean,” she said, cutting him off in mid stammer. “And please don’t apologize. I was thinking the same thing about you.”

Bob blushed and looked down into his lap. “Oh, I doubt that,” he said.

The woman reached over and took Bob’s chin in her hand, turning his face toward her.

“I was thinking you’re the most perfect man I’ve ever seen,” she said.

Bob looked into her eyes, and the depth of her gaze made him dizzy. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“But I’m just…”

“I don’t want to hear it. You’re handsome. You’re sexy. You’re perfect.”

The cabin bell rang as the plane descended through 10,000 feet and the captain turned on the seatbelt sign. A flight attendant made an announcement that all electronic items should be turned off and stowed for landing, but Bob barely heard it.

“You can’t be serious,” Bob said. “Is this some kind of joke? Who put you up to this?”

“Look into my eyes,” the woman said. “Are these the eyes of someone who’s joking?”

Bob stared into her eyes. Her wonderful, dark blue eyes.

“No…I don’t…I’m, I’m not…” his voice trailed off.

“Would you like to get together after we land?” the woman asked.

Bob was still looking into her eyes.

“Yes, I’d like to get together after we land,”

“Then why don’t you go ahead, and I’ll catch up with you later?”

A weak frown wrinkled Bob’s forehead. He tried to pull his eyes away from hers, and found he couldn’t.

“Go ahead?” he asked.

“Sure,” the woman said. “You head down first, and I’ll catch up with you.”

“I…I don’t know…” Bob stared into the woman’s eyes. He found he felt better when he didn’t try to look away. Looking into those gorgeous eyes made him feel warm and comfortable. He had begun to drool.

“It’ll be fine,” the woman said. “You go ahead, and I’ll join you later.” She placed her hand on Bob’s crotch. “It’ll be worth the wait, I promise.”

Bob looked down into his lap, barely registering what he was seeing. He looked back up, and stared questioningly into the woman’s eyes.

“It’ll be fine?”

“Would these eyes lie?”

Bob didn’t hesitate. “No.” He reached for the handle on the emergency exit door.

“Wait,” the woman said. As Bob hesitated, she tugged at her seatbelt to make sure it was snug. “You may proceed.”

***

Bob’s naked body wasn’t found until the following spring, when a farmer plowed it up in his field. It was speculated that his clothes had been torn free of his body during the fall.

A male passenger who had been sitting across the aisle told investigators that he had seen Bob reaching for the emergency door handle and had yelled at him to stop. He said Bob seemed to hesitate, but by the time he had unfastened his seatbelt Bob had pulled the door open. It was all he could do not to be sucked out through the open door right behind Bob.

Flight attendants reported observing Bob speaking to the empty seat next to his. They had seen a lot stranger behavior from passengers over the years, so they didn’t think anything of it.

___
© 2009 Robert C. Eccles
http://www.facebook.com/people/Bob-Eccles/1584386700

10:30 am. I just watched a man disappear. Maybe I’m having an off day or I’m losing it, been a long time since I took a vacation. Anyway, he’s quite new to the office, tall and thin with small glasses and two tufts of grey hair above his ears. He went into the records room.

10:33 am. I double checked. There’s nobody in there now. I’ve got a great view of the door from where I sit and I definitely didn’t see anyone leave. Nobody else went in either, pretty sure of that, haven’t taken my eyes away at all. Trying not to blink! Checked my email again, still nothing. I think I’d prefer not to get anything actually, it’s Friday and I can’t be bothered starting a whole new thing.

10:40 am. Still nobody come in or out. I’m gonna get a coffee.

10:55 am. Took me longer than I thought. The machine on the first floor is all out so I had to go to the fifth and I needed a pee.

10:59 am. Well, the administrators are administrating away in the personnel department. I’m glad I sit on this side; it would be unnerving if they were facing me. This is nice. I can see them but they have to make an effort to see me, something that I figure they’re not that interested in doing. Oh, hang on, looks like…oh, never mind. False alarm.

11:06 am. No! I was right. It looks as though the Young Executive himself has some urgent stacking and stapling that needs doing. Obviously, it’s way too important for him to do at his desk. Yes, awesome, he’s going in the records room. You have to love that swagger, the puffed out chest, and boom, there he goes. He’s even minimized the second hand car website he was browsing. Ok, let’s wait. Actually, I can still see him from here so I think it’s ok this time, still a bit worried about what happened to new guy though.

11:08 am. Shuffle, shuffle, stack, stack, shuffle, ruffle, stack and oh dear, it appears our Young Executive is out of staples. Heads down, he’s coming out. I’m just gonna check my email again. He can’t find staples. Should I help? Still no emails by the way. Okay, he’s got some. Shit, made eye contact. I tried to smile but…

11:10 am. He’s talking to the head boss admin type fella, personnel magnificus! He is such a little ferret of a man, really freaks me out. I heard the words “personnel file” and “Algernon” mentioned. Is that new guy’s name?

11:15 am. They are still talking. Bit of a kerfuffle going on behind me though. I think Clive from Sales is drunk again. Looks like he’s trying to pick a fight with Peterson. I have to get the hell away from this place as soon as I can, for my sanity if nothing else. This can’t be normal can it? I mean, is it me? Am I so thoroughly missing the point? Oh, hang on again, Our Young Supremo Exec Admin Wonder Boy is going back in again. Oh, he’s shut the door, maybe it’s because I keep staring.

11:18 am. Ok, I just took a quick tour of the desks and he’s still in there. Still shuffling, ruffling and stapling. He’s got his sleeves rolled up in a sort of Miami Vice fake untidy, gonna join you guys on the factory floor and get my hands dirty, I’m really one of you and don’t let my fancy suit and manicured nails fool you kind of way. It’s really something to behold. I’ll be back in five minutes.

1:30 pm. OK, sorry, got caught up in a meeting and then decided that lunch was beckoning. Went to the bookstore as well but nobody needs to know that! Saw Peterson on my way, he reckons that Clive is becoming a liability, says he’s gonna complain to the great admin peoples of personnel. That worries me a bit. I quite like Clive.

1:45 pm. Ahh, the Young Exec is back, guess he finished stapling a while ago. He’s laughing now with ferret man. Bugger, they just looked over and caught me staring. I tried to smile again, nonchalant, I think I just succeeded in looking as though I was about to burp or fart or possibly both.

1:47 pm. Just checked email again. Still nothing. Great. They’re whispering now, can’t quite make out what they are saying but they’ve looked over this way twice already. Why am I even doing this? Nothing they have to say can be that important. Probably just discussing how much they are gonna mess things up again by trying to make things better.

2:15 pm. Got bored. Decided to ask around after new guy. Nobody has any idea where he is. Most people don’t even know who he is, let alone where! Some of the girls who sit over in sales said that they’d seen him earlier but not since then, mind you, they’d said, they don’t have great view from where they sit. They also seemed surprised that I didn’t know. Apparently, he works in my department. This is news to me. Screw it, may as well just finish up what I need to do before the weekend.

3:25 pm. I’ve just been summoned for a meeting with ferret man and Supremo. I’m gonna email you guys this whole rambling diary of my day alone in the office! I know some of you are coming to work tomorrow so I thought you might enjoy the read. I have to go now; they’re waiting for me…in the records room! Maybe I’ll see the mangled body of new guy strapped to the wall. Haha! Ok, gotta go. See you on Monday!!

4:30 pm. You have mail. The system program was unable to deliver the last message sent from this address. This is a permanent error. Sorry it didn’t work out for you.

___
©2009 David Rees-Thomas

David Rees-Thomas lives in Japan but originally hails from Wales. He is addicted to writing and has a deep love for the short story. He likes a diverse variety of writers such as Raymond Carver, Philip K.Dick, Michael Moorcock and Jay McInerney. He also dabbles in musical creation. You can find some of those dabblings on the Phenotypo web page here- www.soundclick.com/phenotypo and other writings on sites such as Microhorror and Alienskin.